Hey everybody, Abraham here back with another blog. I want to continue some of my thoughts from the last blog, as I spent most of it introducing myself. Specifically, I want to write about my relationship with Catholicism and religion. After, I will offer some thoughts on race and ethnicity in relation to my White appearance.
In the last blog, I wrote about how I was surprised and comforted by the support for the LGBTQ+ community shown on and off campus in Queretaro. This was unexpected as I understood Mexico had a largely conservative and homophobic culture. I’ve had conversations with Latino friends who agreed that our parents would not take kindly, or even consider the idea of their children being gay. Going from this accepted idea of the country to then seeing my host mom nodding along to a Spanish cohost advocating for gender-affirming care, threw me for a loop. Especially when she never failed to tell me “Dios te acompañe” while I left for school.
My host mother's open-minded nature and devotion to God was a beautiful thing for me to see. That was the first time I’d seen another Catholic's lifestyle seem to mirror mine and my family’s. There are many Christian denominations that are accepting of the LGBTQ+ community, but I have yet to meet another Catholic outside of my family who thinks as I do on the matter. Not in my hometown nor Eugene. For many, a gay Catholic is a contradiction, and it takes a lot of study time invested into scripture, theology, and an understanding that the Church follows the people, for you to think otherwise. All of that time and energy tends only to be worth it for those who need it.
I do want to be careful not to give you the wrong idea on these topics, dear reader, because as unfortunate as it is to say, the greater culture of Mexico does indeed suffer from an accepted culture of casual homophobia. Google “Mexico banned world cup homophobia” if you don’t believe me. If this happens without shame on the world stage, understand what that implies for the culture.
Finally, I want to cover some thoughts on my skin color in relation to my ethnicity. Growing up Mexican-American, I got called beaner, wetback, and the usual others. Jokes were made about my lack of an affinity for hopping 30-foot borders and how good I was at swimming when I was really only decent. It was odd to me at the time and I thought “I’m white, why are they still trying to run this” because I knew nothing about where I landed in the intersection of race, ethnicity, and nationality. I understood that they were being racist and that was a bad thing, so I began to wish that I was dark enough to at least fit the part. In some sort of backward sense, they were more inclusive in their harassment than I was in my perception of the problem. Meanwhile, my whiteness kept me from fitting in with other Mexican kids and I couldn’t speak Spanish so there was no comfort found there either. They just called me a gringo, no sabo kid, and asked why my dad didn’t teach me Spanish.
I bring this up to write about how in Mexico, I’m not a gringo that’s trying to hang out with the Mexican kids, and I’m not a beaner that’s trying to pass with the White kids. At first glance, I’m just a lighter-toned Mexican. The racial diversity in Queretaro is very low but there is definitely a high population of American expats and a strong history of colonization which resulted in a generally lighter population than other areas of Mexico. At the beginning of the program, locals didn’t know I was foreign unless I was with friends or I tried to speak Spanish. By the end of the program, I could get through short exchanges without being caught out as an American. Due to my shade and appearance, I can now pass in two different countries for a local.
All of this blog is to say that as time goes on, and as we grow to learn more about each other, we become closer. Always remember that to live as an open-minded individual, you need to have the communication to back it up. This means sometimes running headfirst into extremely uncomfortable conversations. Have faith that it’s for the better of everyone.
Siempre adelante.
By Abraham Munoz, Diverse Ducks Ambassador
Mexican Studies and Spanish Immersion in Queretaro, Summer 2023
Read More From Abraham
Bringing Multiple Identities to Queretaro, Mexico
Addressing Mental Health Abroad and Gaining a New Perspective at Home